Craig and I are sharing what may be our last sunrise together. And it's beautiful, as sunrises go. I'm buzzing Craig's hand as an amber glow casts a large shadow on his bed and walls. His head drifts gently to the left with each sporadic breath. As the sun's glow takes on a more lemon colored hue, I can't help but admire the view: Erin and Diane snuggled on the bed; Emily sleeping on the floor just below; and a beautiful Craig resting just to the left of me. Perfect. I'm on watch (since 6am when I switched with Erin) as Erin, Diane, Emily and Dad catch up on rest.
That we're all here together is a gift - a gift we're taking one day at a time. After a long night of laughter, tears, and storytelling, we awake this morning to a similar state as yesterday. Craig is still with us, though his body continues to weaken. His breathing is more sporadic, and his heart beats just a little fainter. Still, he's holding on. Occasionally, he appears to be fighting, as if trying to will himself awake. But the process is too strong. With every breath, I can feel more of Craig releasing. He is doing this his way, and on his terms. I'm honored to be by his side as he continues to let go. -- J
As you continue your vigil by Craig, we are greeted by another dazzling Indian summer day in Denver. It's as if there is so much beauty and celebration accompanying Craig's final hours. His mother and many others must be getting together a magnificent welcoming party for him. If only we could see through to that other realm. Maybe this is what has been provided for us, on our side.
ReplyDeleteWoody, Megan, Hilary and I are all thinking about you and this whole process. Hilary called this morning to say she was looking at beetle-killed trees among the brilliant aspens that surround her in Summit County, and she realized that it's all alive, that everything is alive. Megan told me you have all inspired her to hold on to her decision to stay at home for her kids as long as possible and to savor every day -- because that's all that really matters. I am trying to be more "present," to really see what's around me instead of racing through it to finish my check list of things-to-do.
Woody and I have decided to go to the mountains this noon and join Meg and her kids at Hilary's house. The idea of a family reunion and hugging all our loved ones seems just right now. We want you to use our house in any way you want while we're gone. Jim has the key - there are plenty of freshly-made beds for you, cushy chairs to collapse in, books books books and magazines, music, TV, WINE. We would love to see you here when we get back on Sunday night.
Please know how much we love you all. You are constantly in our thoughts - Georgia
I'm so sorry Craig has gone to the other shore but I will continue to believe that he is with loved ones that have their arms open to comfort and love him. My family cries with you and send their love to you all.
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Aunt Donna