It’s one in the morning, and not one of us is asleep. We haven’t been able to wake Craig since five this evening. He’s drifted to a place that we can’t follow. All we can do is hold his hand and talk about the good times, and memories of happy lives together. He can hear us; that we know. Whether he’ll wake tomorrow waits to be seen. While one part of me wants to hear his voice one more time, another hopes the end to his pain is near. He looks peaceful; to wake him from this would be cruel.
So, here we are -- a place that seems so familiar. The timing of all of this is ironic, yet beautiful. Three months ago today, we were huddled in Mom’s hospital room, awaiting the worst. Tonight, we are huddled in Craig’s hallways and in his room, discussing his symptoms and acknowledging that something profound has occurred. Emily has called into work; Dad has joined our slumber party and has taken his spot on the couch. He’s sleeping on Craig’s rickety hide-a-bed and has borrowed one of Craig’s old scarves to shield his eyes from the morning sunlight. The accommodations aren’t perfect, but good enough. We called Dad a few hours ago with the latest. Though he was already preparing for bed at Georgia and Woody’s, he decided to drive the distance to Craig’s to be with his son. And if Craig were awake, he’d laugh. The scarf around his eyes makes Dad look like we plucked him straight off the Greyhound bus; now we’re holding him hostage in the front room. Hilarious. At least we’re laughing.
It’s strange how one can be so sure – so absolutely sure – about something, and then just as quickly, it changes. Our life has been altered drastically. But in this change, we find beauty and peace. As I sit by Craig’s side, I can feel the love around him. We’ll be by his side until the end; when that will be, is Craig’s decision. -- J
My darling friends, It is early morning at our house and we realized that Jim wasn't here. We have just read your recent blogs. I have called Megan. Our hearts are breaking along with yours. With love all around him, we look forward as you do to Craig's being finally at peace. The love will stay with him. I hope you can feel our love and respect surrounding you. You are remarkable people and it is our great great privilege to know you. We want to stay close always.
ReplyDeleteIf you check your email, please let us know what is going on. We hesitate to call until later with the chance you may all be getting some rest. We want all of you to come and stay with us at our house. There is a bedroom upstairs as you know where two of you could sleep and there is another double bed (futon) in the basement with its own closet and bath. Please come here and rest and start healing and recovering.
Tears are running down my face so I can't go on. We love you all and we are sending all our love to Craig, Georgia and Woody