So, yesterday I began my Craig rotation and Jill and I discovered a new definition for hectic and overwhelmed. Just when I think I can't do anymore, we learn that we have to do more, and it seems I can. Although I think we are all a little at our max. At least I am. Yesterday began at 9. I woke up, checked on mom, started breakfast and waited for Jill to get back from Craig's so we could get her out of bed and dressed. I laid her clothes out and got a "station" ready for Jill with wipes, gloves, etc, so she wouldn't have to wait. Anyway, we got her up and ready without any problems. Breakfast was ready by ten when the nurse came and I was headed out the door to Craig's. Showers are hit and miss anymore with me and frankly, I don't care. I figure if I can't smell me, it's okay, right? :)
I have been having mixed feelings over doing Craig's caretaking. On the one hand, I haven't had much time alone with him and I feel the distance. On the other hand, I'm not sure I have what it takes to care for him well; to make sure he gets all his meds exactly on schedule and with a smile, to be able to make him laugh the way I used to. I'm a different sister, I think, and I'm not sure how that fits into this process yet.
But, even with those feelings, I decided to try yesterday. I got there around eleven and was able to take him to his regular appointment with Dr. Flaig, who is very optimistic about Craig's ability to stabilize. The appointment was otherwise uneventful, which was a really, REALLY good thing. Craig seemed to take Dr. Flaig's enthusiasm in stride, not showing much emotion in the moment, but I imagine it feels good to finally have some consistent good news.
Anyway, yesterday evening was a round of back and forths for Jill and I. I'm in charge of Mom's meals and Jill had to work, so things were crazy. But, it worked out. I was back at Craig's by 12:30 and hooked his saline back up without any problems.
Which brings me to this morning. He gets a gigundo bolus of meds at 6 am and Jill and Erin wake up at 5:45 to get them ready to be delivered on time. Well, this morning didn't work out so hot. I might have woken up at 6:30. Luckily, there's a window of an hour where he can still get the meds. As I was putting them together, eyes still half glued shut, I hear "Jill, you coming with those?" I decided not to correct him. "Yeah. Just getting them ready for you." I keep working. A couple minutes later, I hear "Jill, you coming?" I think to myself, "Dude, if Jill were here, you'd have them already." And then I think, "Never tell Jill that." A couple more minutes pass and I hear again "Jiiiiilllll...." This time I'm getting a smidge irritated, it is 6 in the morning. In my calmest voice, I say "I'm almost done. And it's Diane." I didn't hear anything until I walked into the room. It must have been quite the rude awakening to see which sister was actually here.
"Oh," said in Craig's best deadpan voice. "I didn't know it was YOU. What, did you sleep here or something?"
Yes, Craig, yes I did. And I messed with all your stuff. Muwhahahahaha.
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