Heading home

It’s Thursday morning. Diane and Erin continue to sleep as I welcome in yet another sunrise. Man, I’m tired. My eyes are burning from fatigue. Though I’d love nothing more than to sleep through the morning, my body won’t allow it. Whether fighting back nightmares or just restless with unspent energy, we’re all finding it hard to turn in. It’s difficult to re-set the clock after fourteen months of living in crisis mode.

Though we're tired, the truth is fatigue is going to have to take it on the chin, at least for another week. In a few hours, we’ll pack up our cars with Craig’s books and head east towards Oklahoma in time for Craig’s Stillwater service. With luck, the cats will behave themselves during our ten hour drive home. Dad flew home to Stillwater last Monday to prepare for this Saturday’s service. Diane, Erin, and I stayed back to start packing Craig’s apartment, which, by all standards, has been a slow process. Gutting his apartment just doesn’t feel right, not when we have another memorial service just ahead. Though we’ve boxed a few of his books, the three of us agreed that the larger, more sentimental items could be addressed after Saturday’s service in Stillwater.

This Saturday will mark our third service in as many months. We’ve become pros in all things funeral, but lucky for us, we’ve had support. Immediately after Mom’s death, family friends and colleagues in Stillwater were at the ready to offer help with food and reception preparation. Our family from Michigan joined us in Stillwater to say goodbye. Our community embraced us with love and support during the few days we were in Stillwater to lay Mom to rest. Last week, the baton was passed to our Denver community. Throughout Craig’s process, we’ve been overwhelmed by people’s generosity and loving spirit. We’ve grown to know so many over these past months, and feel honored to call Craig’s friends and acquaintances our friends. And to our family, we are blessed to have you in our lives. Your support helped us get through Craig's service.

As we prepare to head to Stillwater, it's comforting to know we'll be coming home to friends. Just like three months ago, family friends have offered their support to make Saturday as easy as possible for us. It will be hard to say our final goodbyes to Craig and lay him to rest next to Mom. Sadly, this weekend will also mark the first time to visit Mom since her service in July. This weekend will be difficult but we'll get through it.

To all who have walked beside Mom and Craig during their battle with cancer, and who continue to be a part of our lives, thank you. Before Craig passed, Diane, Erin and I were discussing how difficult it must be for friends and colleagues to witness Craig and Mom struggle against the end stages of cancer. Cancer isn’t easy, and seeing a loved one struggle is often too hard to take. But, for you, it was never simply their struggle. By bringing food, sharing stories and laughter, and loving Mom and Craig unconditionally, you helped to shoulder some of their burden and made life with cancer easier to manage. Thank you for your support, for staying present, and for taking time out of your lives to be a part of theirs. We feel overwhelmed by everyone’s continued love and support.

Diane, Erin, (Sammie and Max) and I will be back in Denver next week. For now, we're taking it one day at a time … -- J